Monday, 22 October 2012

Where fitting in leads you

So I've been reflecting a lot the last few days on life and what it was like and is like to be a teenager, trying to fit in yet trying to be your self all at the same time. It never made sense to me then and it still doesn't now. It seems like every one is dying to be different but then if you are different you really want to be the same and some how someone gets to choose for you who is cool or not and then if you aren't "cool" you have the OK to pick on the person who is actually doing what you want to do and that's to be different.  OK so did that make sense to anyone cause now I'm confused all over again.

What led me to all this was simply a story I read on a social media site about a young girl from North America who was bullied online by her peers for various reasons which resulted in her taking her life. If that wasn't bad enough it didn't end there. These peers of hers are continuing the abuse on a site dedicated to her memory!! I read that and just thought you have GOT to be kidding me!!!  How is this possible? Who would do this? I can't comprehend this. Now I know  I wasn't always the nice kid in  High school, I was picked on when I was young and I grew up and did the same thing others did to me. I loved gossip and I hurt others. Hurt people hurt other people. I know that it wasn't right and i would change it if I could believe me! We didn't really have all the social media sites they do now days but I couldn't ever imagine doing what kids are doing now days to other kids.

My next thought was how does this happen? I defiantly want to blame parents and yes I'm sure there is truth in that. Why are parents not monitoring there kids stuff? Why have they been able to grow up thinking it's OK to make fun of or bully anyone for being different that's a earned behaviour. It's also society. Our world is so diverse but really only if you choose it. If I wanted I could allow my son to never socialise with someone of a different race, religion, or any other thing that makes us different. Which  could make him believe that being anything but what he is, is wrong, weird, or worthy of being bullied for. I want to blame social media and how it doesn't protect us. It took me forever to figure out how to protect my sons pictures and even then who knows who has seen them or stolen them on the Internet.  Young kids are posting every small detail of there life not realising that once it's online its there for the whole world to see even after you delete it.

We are all different, and to that I say thank you God for creating us to be diverse, to each have our piece to the puzzle of life. I need people who see things differently that can point out when I'm wrong. (which isn't often ask my husband) who can do different things than i can. Friends who parent different so i can learn other ways. Neighbours who help me learn to love  in a new way. kids who with out knowing it point out every flaw in me and challenge me to fix it.

So please next generation fight to be who you are! Fight against the society who is putting a label on you. Fight for the things that you believe in and the things that define you. Please be careful on social media learn how to protect your self and please only allow your real friends access to your life. Friends stand up for one another fight with your friend when they are being picked on or made fun on. I know it's on a thousand cheesy school posters with kids from the 90s but by not saying anything you are agreeing. You may not think so but ask your friend who is being picked on how they felt when you sat there not saying anything to help them. And parents please look at what your kids are saying to other kids. Take your child out into the world let them love and be loved by different kinds of people.

Baby J and his friends in Cambodia
Baby J and his Kiwi Auntie
Baby J and our beloved Neighbour
Here are a few pictures of the many kinds of people who love my son and who my son Loves most in this world.

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