Social media and why it causes me to be less social.

I have a lot on my heart and mind tonight. We live in a tough world. There's a lot of big controversial stuff out there and thanks to the Internet and social media its all in our face. We have become a generation that freely and openly slings hate at each other and calls it our opinion and uses that to justify it. We make fun of each other via YouTube and twitter and say its ok because they put it up there. We are seeing a generation of kids who put all there self worth in how many likes they have on a picture and judge there beauty on comments received. We allow our selves to judge each other based on a snippet of ones lives we see. As a mum this is easily done. I see the other mums in all there Pinterest birthday parties and homemade laundry soaps and I get down on my self, I see friends on family Holidays and I get jealous and angry.  These things cause me to second  guess who I am and hide away, when in reality that glimpse of a perfect child is simply that a glimpse. We all have those perfect moments where our kids are quiet and cute, or playing nicely with their siblings, or doing the darnedest  things for the whole world, but it's the moment after we never see. The moment when the little sister pulls the hair, or the child throws that toy one second after we snap the picture. Those are the moments are lives are made up of that we never allow the world to see but the ones people really need to. I have a friend who is the mum of 5 amazing, crazy, gorgeous, funny, and very real kids. She is always posting the funny, awkward, and not so perfect things they do. You see photos of the smiles the hugs and the tantrums. And I love it! Why because she is real with real children and she embraces all the crazy! She shows true love to her kids and that love spills out into her everyday life. I want to be  her, well minus the 5 kids but I want to be that real and ok with it. Social media is handy for our family. We live on the other side of the world from many friends and family so thanks to blogs, and FB and such they have been able to watch my son grow up. But I have a hate side to social media, like I said before Its brings  out an ugly  side to most of us. It's allowed us to all stand up on our soapboxes and scream at one another with out having to really listen to each other. It's become a place where are publicly abused for our ideas and beliefs if you are brave enough to state them. Honestly I would love to say what I'm always feeling and thinking about where I see other people have it slightly or very wrong but that would make me no better than them.  Your not going to agree with everything everyone says and your not always right in what you think you know. we have based to much on glimpses. glimpes from the media, FB, Youtube, And twitter but none of that is the whole story. This is where love comes in, get to know people out side of social media, hear each others stories, stop judging on what you see it's not the whole story. Sit with peopel of different, cultures, beleifs snd religions, find out what they are really about. And just because some one uses different words or calls something by an unfamiliar  name doesn't mean it's not what you know, love, or believe in. I'm not perfect, my families not,perfect, we don't get it right with each other, our son, our friends, or our neighbours. I judge, I put people in boxes but I'm trying. I'm trying to ask more questions before I form an opinion. And my opinions are never written in stone. You never know when someone just might change your mind. So my friends be real with each other don't be afraid to be social with those you don't understand. And don't forget to be confidant in who you are. Don't hide because you do things differently,  Thats what makes this world amazing,. if we allow or selves to get out of our hiding places and sit with others you never know who you might encourage because they do things a bit different as well, or who might encourage you. 

The small stuff can make you sweat

I have a crazy but cute 23 months old. He spends his days exploring his surroundings by dumping every toy, block, wash cloth, and anything else he can get his hands on all over the floor. This isn't a malicious act its just him exploring figuring things out and just being a boy. Now to some this could get really annoying and trust me it does, but I decided when I  became a  mum to not sweat the small stuff. He isn't hurting any one or anything. He has his own room that most of this happens in so if people drop by we can always just shut the door. Don't get me wrong he has to clean up, well help as much as he can, but for me it's about what really matters. Does it really matter he prefers to dump his blocks all over the floor  and then put them in bags or tea cups and bring them to me to buy or eat? Nope not really. Or that his face washers or probably never actually clean due to the fact that they are mostly on the floor. Nah they are usually just used for his boogers. Now don't hear this and think I'm the most laid back non stressed mum ever cause trust me when you are folding laundry and he's unfolding it with his sticky fruit snack hands it gets a bit annoying. But those are the moments I try my best to clean off his hands and give him his own pile of laundry to fold well to more or less ball up and throw on top of my neat piles. My crazy little blonde haired boy loves to be by my side. He really just wants to help and learn. He loves doing anything I do. To bad he's not a little more coordinated with a broom.  There are defiantly days when the little things, the constant messes and cleaning up and constant string of words that nobody can understand gets to me. But I'm trying. Aren't we all to let loose and have fun with our kids. Give them memories of being allowed to be seen and heard and to be who they are. So if that means I have to cheers a hundred cups of tea, or step on a few pointy blocks then that's what I will do. Today I moved his little table out to our tiled living space and we played with different textures from our kitchen cupboards. First we smeared flour all over and drew shapes and our names. Well ok I drew his name and he drew well who knows. Then it was the grainy texture of corn meal. I don't think he was a fan of that one because it instantly got piled up in to the little holes he uses as cup holders in the table. Then came the oats which surprisingly didn't go straight into his mouth. Halfway through this adventure he went into the kitchen and brought out the whisk to help with his master piece. By the end we had flour on us, the floor, the coffee table, and some innocent utensils in the drawers. He loved it, we loved it, and after a few minutes of clean up the house was normal again. So this is me trying to not get all hot and sweaty over the small stuff. I'm not perfect but I'm trying.

My little piano man

My son has loved music and everything that goes with it since the day he was born. He entered this world as U2 was singing about how it was a beautiful day, and it in deed was a beautiful day.at 2 weeks old he would sit and stare as opa played the keyboard and sang some song about a fly and a tree and some old lady. At 4 months old he sat behind a guitar with his dad and with his little fingers loved to try and strum. Now don't get me wrong I by no means think I have a musical geniuses.  But I defiantly have a little boy that loves music. He has his favourite songs and he loves to start singing the night night song to himself when he's ready for a nap. Which is a handy clue to me that he's sleepy. He picks up on the hand motions even when I'm pretty sure no one really taught him. Now all of this I've know since forever, and I've always known its from his daddy. Some days it seems like that's all he got from his daddy. I'm reminded everyday in his looks, mannerisms,and especially attitude that he's my little male mini me. But today I discovered something he else he gets from his daddy, his love to preform. Now we've seen him form boy bands with his cousin friend, and a microphone always calms him down, but today I saw a different side to him. We were in our local little big city with some friends and there were several decorated pianos placed around the mall area to promote our  regions annual music festival ,and even with heaps of people walking by and starring all he wanted to do was play. He stood next to his daddy and danced and played along to benny and the jets on the first piano we found. And then not even the play area could keep away from piano number two. By the time we found the third one he wanted to play all on his own. He was so cute but I defiantly think its time for some lessons. Like I said I definitely don't have a musical genius on my hands. But I also know he didn't get this boldness from his mama who would hide behind her daddy's legs well into her teens when she met new people.  All I can say is I hope he looses a little of my stubbornness and gains more of his daddy's confidence. 

I'm 30 and I know it

So this past Sunday I turned 30. I didn't melt or go have a midlife crisis, I don't feel like my life has ended nor did I sit around making a list of all the things I want to do in my next 30 years. I spent my weekend with the people I'm closest to here in Australia. I spent my saturday celebrating the first year of a beautiful little girl who I get to share my birthday with. I had dinner with friends who have become my family. And I celebrated my little cousins birthday. ( I'm 4 days older than him) I spent my first week at being 30 helping my friends and work mates get to their next adventure. Not much has changed from bring 29 to 30. But I do love saying I'm 30. I'm not sure why. I didn't suddenly become any more wise and amazing than I already was.

My 20's we're a decade of change. I left my home town and totally changed my career path. I traveled to more countries than I ever thought. I made heaps of new friends who are labeled family. I got married, changed countries, added a new member to our family and even changed my hair. It was an amazing 10 years packed with so much I can't really believe it.

If asked what my 30's will look like whoa man I can't even imagine. I hope they are a little slower going than my 20's I'm getting to old to move that fast. But I sure hope it includes adding more friends from all over the world. I would like to show my son the world instead of just showing him pictures from a book. I hope to learn to love more and give of my self more. To continue to believe in who I am and always rise to a challenge and fight for what I believe in. I hope my voice becomes louder and stronger with out having to say a word.

Thank you to all who helped me usher in this new decade!

Lessons I've learned in the last week

So this week had been one of the craziest and busiest weeks I've had in a very long time. I volunteered for the job as visa gopher for our office as we are preparing for a trip to S.E. Asia for 19 people. At the start of this adventure I thought I would take a train up to the consulate and then wait to days and go up again. I was wrong, very wrong. It ended up taking me 4 days, 16 train hours and lots of patients to get the job done. But as I look back on this fun but slightly stressful time I see I have learned what could be very useful life lessons.

#1 the train ride is long and deodorant is optional for some so breathe out of your mouth.

#2 even though the consulate tells you one thing always bring extra copies of EVERYTHING!!

#3 eating while walking may save time but it just makes you tired and sick feeling

#4 no matter how hot, a large bubble tea is never needed

#5 any bag carrying that much money,papers, and passports in the summer heat is going to be hot so just pick the one that makes you look less like a tourist and more like you belong in the business district.

#6 there are never public restrooms when you need them so just act like you know what you are doing and walk in to any place of business or conservatory and act like you belong.

#7 make friends with the security guard, you never know when you need them to print out papers for you.

#8 children are only going to be sick right before you leave so never dress in what you really want to wear. Wait till after you leave then change on the train.

#9 it takes less than 16 hours to read 400 pages, buy 2 good books.

#10 never volunteer for the visa run again
( joking I've really enjoyed my adventure)

A nation in tears and the debate that goes with it.

I woke up the other morning to tragic news, I couldn't believe another school shooting and this time little kids. Tiny precious people who barely have lived. Kids who still believe people are good and life is full of rainbows and sunshine. Kids who were waiting in anticipation for Santa to come.

Since I live on the other side of the world i quickly got on line to see what I could find. The news wasn't saying much and all FB had to offer was people's stances on gun control. This has been a debate I've heard my whole life. One that gets stronger every time this happens and one that may never go away. I have vey mixed views on this, and since I currently live overseas I'm not even completely sure what the current laws are. I grew up with a dad that hunted,I know how to clean,shoot, and care for a gun. They were in my home apart of my life. I knew they were dangerous and not to be even looked at with out my dad around. So what makes me different than this shooter? Why have I not turned to violence? I could go on and on about violent video games and lack of parenting but this is not what this post is about. People seem to argue if your around guns you will use them. I don't necessarily believe having guns is bad but here is my first response. Know your kids, teach them right from wrong and if you have angry or depressed kids get rid of your guns. Keep guns locked up and keys hidden. I don't feel it's necessary to have semi automatic guns available for sale. Why would you ever need a military type gun for general use. I also can't understand why you can purchase riot gear or bullet proof vests. Why do you need those for general use? I don't necessarily think getting rid of all the guns are going to solve anything. This problem is deeper than all that. Why are people like this young man not getting help? Why are these troubled kids not seen and helped? I don't feel like this is anyone one problem. It's not one persons fault. It's due to a series of problems. I don't know his family or what his life was like so I won't say I have all the answers or even speculate what his problem was. But what I do know is this. Our nation is in pain. Children are scared to go to school and people are reacting. People are running to churches, debates,and opinions to make them feel better. We are slinging violent opinions at each other,not even caring how it makes the other person feel. What makes us any better than this young man? We are automatically putting blame one one type of person, or a group of people with certain beliefs. What we should be doing is banning together in love. Make the victims known and celebrate there life. We need to learn to see people. Say hello to people on the street, care about your neighbour, get to know someone who is different than you. We need to stop being violent with our words and start loving. I'm mot saying your opinion doesn't matter I does. I just stated mine but please think of others before you speak. And to all those affected my prayers go out to you and your families and I am deeply sorry this happened to your beautiful baby.

It's been a while

So it's been weeks since my last post,but I still have a lot to say. I'm not sure what's been stopping me busy life, no time, writers block, or maybe a little of all of it. Even at this moment I'm not really sure what to talk about. My life lately has been centred around my one year old and Christmas. I love the Christmas season it's bright and cheery and magical and dramatic. It's never perfect and it's crazy but I love it. I've enjoyed this season with J it's his second Christmas and its so much fun and difficult at the same time. He loves all the ornaments on the tree and he's pretty good at looking and not touching but every once in awhile he says mama no and hands me an ornament he's taken off the tree, oh well at least he can say the rule. He's at a very unique stage right now. He's growing and learning so much and most days it's a blast but other days man he is lucky he is cute! But even at the end of the hardest day all he has to do is say mama and hold up his chubby little arms for a cuddle and I'm hooked and all is forgiven.

I've been processing another warm Christmas, I don't know if it will ever become normal but I'm definitely used to it. I get very confused when I see my friends in sweaters and playing in snow. There are some things I really love about an Aussie Christmas. BBQ breakfast, not being freezing cold waiting to open your presents till the heater kicks in. Getting to stay up late on Christmas Eve because its still light out and well I'm the mummy now so I do the telling When it's bed time. But I have been very confused buying gifts I keep thinking I should buy my husband sweaters. Isn't that what you buy at Christmas time? I'm very excited to watch my son on Christmas morning he's just starting to know what presents are so hopefully we don't loose the plot quickly this year and enjoys it. Although I'm sure he's going to love the wrapping paper and boxes much more than the gifts under the tree.

We did buy a little tree for our little house and we love it. It's is our third Christmas here but our first tree. Our first year we were at some friends for Christmas so no tree the second year I was pregnant and oh so very sick and almost forgot about Christmas and so this year we are in our home puke free and not pregnant and ready to settle into yep we live here and here is our tree to prove it. I feel like buying a little tree is a big step when you are an expat. It's much more than a simple decoration it's a statement. Its says this is where my roots are going. I'm buying something I have to store because yep I'm Planning on being here for a few more years! Or maybe it is just a tree you decide...

Ok I know it's not much of a post but I have to get my blog flow going again....